Old kittens! The focus of everything here is experience sharing and education for Black women and the Other Brothers who love them but over and over, I've been testifying that my Mother was elder abused. What does this have to do with swirling? Our family is everything!
First, condolences to me. Kneegrows don't know how to acknowledge death. Proper death etiquette is to say: I'm sorry for your loss Or My Condolences To You. If you think that Black America is hard on it's women and girls what do you this is happening to their elder women? Save the story about how loved your Grandmother is she is the minority. The majority of elder Black women in America are catching hell as mules, mammies, hotels, banks and short order cooks or they've gone mad from stress.
Long story short a beautiful young Black couple married and divorced happens all the time except the Husband chose not to co-parent nor contribute in any way to the upbringing of their seven children including a special needs child. Reread that sentence again, if you please. That is my Father.
Here is a classic piece of performance art from my underground TV show (which started in the 1990's)! Thanks Daddy is the psychological effects of fatherlessness on the Black female psyche. Music, script and performance by yours truly. Lighting by the fabulous Richard with camera by my film mentor, Scarlot Harlot.
Don't cry for me San Francisco, the truth is I'm very mixed media. Years of therapy resolved the mystery of my emotionally unavailable, sociopath father. Hell yes voluntary absentee dads are sociopaths given a pass by the Black community. Instead of shame, bums like my Dad are coddled and excused while the custodial parent aka The Black Woman is demonized. How's that working out? Just ask the kids in Chicago, Oakland and Detroit. What happens to children of destructive emotionally unavailable men?
I knew it wasn't normal that Daddy didn't visit us or pay alimony and thanks to Mad Magazine and Stevie Wonder for socializing me that Fathers are to love and care for their children, if not for those two influences I would have swallowed the lie that what he did was normal.
|Guess who was a comic book geek?|
And for want of a better term, I got over it. So did Mother, she remarried a very nice man that I learned to call Daddy...
In a nutshell years of therapy taught me that just because someone doesn't love you that doesn't make you unlovable, and if that person who doesn't love you is your Father, that makes him an asshole.
He remains alive with his second wife while a deeply loved grandmother and great grandmother lies in her early grave. The day my Mother died I phoned with the news and scolded him about the political incorrectness of his attendance at the funeral. His behavior would make his attendance at her funeral a travesty and my will was done. It felt like justice. I am at peace about him since that day and thank the sky for Stevie Wonder who happily tells the world how much he loves his daughter.